A little off but not out

Today was the first day in a bit of a while that I have not worked out. It is what it is I suppose. I was productive in other ways. I applied to 2 more summer programs and filed my taxes online. I've also been keeping a detailed practice log which makes me sound like I don't practice as much as I thought I did. I guess I'm only keeping track of my time horn-to-face which isn't really fair because breaks are an effective part of practice. I've been going to the symphony a lot lately, which sort of exacerbates my desire to become great. I think I'm done with this mediocrity. Okay.

I feel strangely today and I'm not sure why. It might be because of my lack of exercise. Or because after going to the symphony last night, I stayed up with friends until 2:00 am. Or it might be because I've given up fish for Lent. It's been about 11 days and I've been trying to increase my protein intake and eat a more diverse diet. I've also been experimenting with eating outside of my usual fare for dinner. Tofu has helped immensely in this exploit.  

There was an earthquake in Chile. Upsetting for a number of reasons, not just the tragedy that I'm sure is still occuring there. A tsunami is or was apparently supposed to hit the coast of California. I thought yesterday that something strange was looming in the future. Maybe this is it. I'm not really sure what's going on but the waves seem to be more than just physical and water. 

I believe that sex

should never hurt someone else. Even if you enjoy it. Coming from where I've been, I know what it's like to be inadvertently told that you're worthless so penetratingly. I just wish it was 2008 and we could do it all over again. And maybe get it right this time. Ugh, today has been a long day...I just broke my necklace, I feel like crying and I want to go to sleep and wake up never. 

THIS IS PUBLIC

and I would do well to remember that. A simple google search of my name can yield results that I hadn't realized that I was unprepared for. Oh well, it's all out in the open now. Everyone has access to this, including the folks I might be discussing. That's what I get for not respecting the power of the interwebs. It's a series of tubes, really.