Flexible

My heart is not going to be hardened by this. It's going to become malleable and stronger than it's ever been. I don't want to lose my compassion. I won't lose empathy and love. It's not right and it's not fair and I've been having existential qualms about the world. How can it be such a wonderful place when people are allowed to treat other people like this?
My family will lose the home that my great grandfather built. In 4 months, I won't have a place to go back home to. It could possibly happen sooner but, I can't think about that.
I gave him a letter that summarized all of the things that I've been feeling. He kind of made fun of me that I typed it. He had a hickey on his neck and he said "He was hoping to avoid me because of it" At least he didn't ruefully chuckle like I imagined he would the moment I saw it.
I'm pretty sure I saw the guy that he's dating in the Castro. I had to check on Facebook to make sure it was him. It was.
My friend's ex girlfriend is treating him even worse than Evan is treating me, if that's possible. I have to practice with her and I will be civil and kind. But, I can't pretend that she's a good person anymore.
I can't even begin to think about horrible shit in the world or anything. I'm barely strong enough to survive all that's going on right now in my life.
But I will end this positively. The only thing that I can think of is that after this is done, I will be so much stronger than I am now. And it makes me slightly less sad to think that in a couple of months, a year, 10 years from now, my life and the lives of others around me will be so much better.