Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Find the peace. Let it go. Be okay.

My new affirmation for myself. I must let it all go. There is some weird thing inside masquerading as a part of me that wants to hold on to the past, my expectations of the future, these feelings. I feel like it's right next to my heart. So close that I can't distinguish the two. I must find some semblance of peace.
One thing that I have been terrified of doing is merely trying to be okay. I don't want to try. I want to do. That weird thing is keeping me from it. It can't be true or authentic. I want, with all of my being, to be happy and okay. I've been learning that It's always something or another. If only.....(I didn't have to work, I was a better musician, he loved me, blahblahblah)....
There's always going to be something. I can't put off feeling good anymore just because of a pattern of disagreeable circumstances. So, now what?

2 comments:

Dwyn said...

Affirmations are handy! My particular favorite for when my head is fried and I'm feeling like shit is 'This too shall pass.'

I am sending warm fuzzies your way! When I get home, we should do lunch or something, it's been AGES!

changapeluda said...

when i read the title of this post i thought you were
gettin' rid of some
richly deserved peace....

and then telling yourself to be okay with That.

which is kinda how we roll and something we gotta
Change.